early morning entry or why in the world am I awake?

Wondering why I keep waking up in the wee hours of the a.m.  Not sure. Too much on my mind. Being alone in a house is hard. I sometimes just miss the everyday sounds of another person's movements. Don't take those sounds for granted. Just knowing someone else is in the house can be comforting. Hearing them open a door, rustle around in the bathroom, getting dressed, opening the fridge, getting a snack and leaving a mess. The sounds that are just there. It's quiet. very quiet. Sometimes when my kids were little, I would just want peace and quiet. I used to hear people say, oh no.... just enjoy them, they will be gone soon enough. I would just shudder and say, you're wrong. I now know what they were saying. I bought a huge 3 foot stuffed white polar bear who sits in my living room. He has personality and greets me each day as I come home, but, alas, he is quiet. 

All quiet is not bad though.... I do enjoy my solitude, especially after spending 8 or more hours at school in a lively room of 21 first graders. I cherish those quiet moments when I can sit on my couch, put up my feet and just enjoy the moments of silence. It's at the dawning of the day, the tucking in at night and other moments in the day that catch me by surprise that I realize I am really alone.